Over the last few years, I have had many ideas for blog topics, but the Time Magazine cover article titled, "Are you Mom Enough," is perfect to kick-off my Good and Bad Thoughts. After all, it puts a skinny and perfectly coiffed mom and her nearly-4-year-old son at her breast on the cover, both facing the camera and daring the reader to comment on their photo. The photo is skillfully created to create controversy and stir up the so-called, "Mommy Wars" by encouraging mothers, fathers and gawkers all over to pass judgement on others' parenting styles.
Making choices for small children is difficult--parents decide what they eat, what they wear, what they're doing, whether they're old enough or big enough or capable enough to handle certain foods, certain people, certain activities. Parents slogging away at the daily tasks it takes to raise a family don't need judgement, they need support. They need that village that helped parents all over the world raise their children instead of feeling the critical eye of those around them. Parenting has turned into a competitive sport and it takes a lot of courage to take oneself out of the game.
I did not breastfeed my first child until he was four. It is unlikely I will do so for my second. Even so, that mom on the cover is not more or less of a mother than me. We are both parenting in the way we know how and in the ways we know best. No one "wins" the Mommy Wars, instead all moms (and dads) just trudge along, moving forward until their kids start running their own races. Even then, we will be cheering from the sidelines.
Making choices for small children is difficult--parents decide what they eat, what they wear, what they're doing, whether they're old enough or big enough or capable enough to handle certain foods, certain people, certain activities. Parents slogging away at the daily tasks it takes to raise a family don't need judgement, they need support. They need that village that helped parents all over the world raise their children instead of feeling the critical eye of those around them. Parenting has turned into a competitive sport and it takes a lot of courage to take oneself out of the game.
I did not breastfeed my first child until he was four. It is unlikely I will do so for my second. Even so, that mom on the cover is not more or less of a mother than me. We are both parenting in the way we know how and in the ways we know best. No one "wins" the Mommy Wars, instead all moms (and dads) just trudge along, moving forward until their kids start running their own races. Even then, we will be cheering from the sidelines.
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